“With all due respect” is a really great phrase that warns you an insult is coming. Coincidentally, using this phrase means the other person thinks the only respect you deserve is equivalent to the respect they give trash. Respect, in general, seems to be a word that is misunderstood. If you ask … [Read more...]
We are Allowed Our Emotions
Last week my second daughter was born two and a half weeks early. I’m not a fan of early birds. They don’t get the worm; early birds get angry neighbors yelling they’re trying to sleep. Here’s a fun aside. With my first daughter, she was born at the perfect time that allowed me to announce on … [Read more...]
Are You Hearing Things Right?
One problem that often pops its head in couples’ therapy is someone not “hearing” what the other person is saying. The person is “listening,” but they don’t “hear” it right. Does that make sense? (See what I did there?) Sometimes we assume we know what the other person is saying without actually … [Read more...]
Beware of the BUT
I’ve always been a “but” guy and never really knew it until recently. (And yes, I meant it to be with one “t” because I’m talking about the “but” and not the “butt.” I’ve never been a “butt” guy. Even when I was young and single, I wasn’t a “butt” guy; I was more of “hot girl” guy. I didn’t like … [Read more...]
Slow to Launch or Not Likely to Launch
After my wife and I were engaged, her one aunt went to her privately and asked, “Are you sure you want to marry Chad when he doesn’t have his life together?” Why do I know this? Because my wife told me something that should’ve been kept private. Fortunately, she didn’t tell me about this until … [Read more...]
Why Women Struggle to be in the Trades
This post could have easily been called “Why Men Don’t Knit.” Choosing this title, however, I followed the shock value marketing strategy of people like Gene Simmons and Eminem (so I’m basically a rockstar... obviously). Please know this title is not to claim women “can’t” be in the trades. I’ve … [Read more...]
The Four Most Important Apologizing Rules
I’ve recently figured out the four most important rules to apologizing (I’m sorry I didn’t figure them out sooner). It came out of the fact that apologizing is a major complaint for most couples I see as a psychotherapist. The complaints almost always come in twos. The first is the apology … [Read more...]
Eye Rolling Destroys Relationships
I’m going to assume you know what I mean when I write “eye rolling.” To be safe, let me point out I’m not referencing a new-age eye exercise where you move your eyes around in circles to improve your chakras or a strange zombie game where you roll eyeballs down a lane like bowling. (Did you just … [Read more...]
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