The person who has had the hardest life of anyone I have met asked me to write something encouraging. As someone who avoids sentimentality and is repulsed by cliché this was an interesting challenge, but one that I was happy to face. I’m not sure how successful I will be at this, but here goes:
There is a truth many of us forget, but it is a powerful thing. It is something that is ours and ours alone. We have a soul. Other people can abuse us; they can beat our bodies; they can manipulate and torment our minds; they can even break and wear down our hearts, BUT our soul is ours, and NO one can take that away from us. We are created with four parts: Body, Mind, Heart and Soul, and only the soul is forever ours. You can’t beat it up. You can’t verbally attack it. Someone you love can’t break it. To quote someone smarter than me, Jesus said, “Don’t be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul.” (Mat 10:28) The three parts, the body, mind, and heart, can all be given away or broken, but your soul is yours and no one can take that away from you. Isn’t that amazing? A family member may have abused you; your peers may have been cruel to you; your mind may play tricks on you; your heart can be heavy burdened, but your soul remains. It is the one thing that remains true, and gives you the potential to be the good person you meant to be. People at weddings say “I give you my heart and soul,” but this is just a romantic way of saying I give you my life. The truth is you can’t give your soul away. You can only point your soul in the direction of something. What we want in life is where our soul is pointed. If your goal is money, comfort, partner, or God, it will affect how you live. Thus, we need to be careful where we point our souls, especially if we want to consider the next life. Ultimately, where you point your soul will affect the rest of your self; it affects your body, mind and heart. Thus, your soul is the greatest of the four. As powerless as we may feel, we ultimately can’t be destroyed because our soul lives beyond the pain. Your soul is the essence of you. It is the spark that is life, and it only leaves our body when it dies. Have you ever seen someone you love soulless in a coffin? Looking at the dead body is weird. Even beyond the typical botched make up job, the person looks different. At my dad’s funeral my mom wiped off most of the makeup they put on him because it was like, “Here’s my dad; he loved cars, tools, and hockey, so after he died we decided to make him a cross dresser.” Even when the body is plasticized for Body Works exhibits, there’s something inhuman about these bodies. So what’s the difference? That spark of life is gone. When you remove the soul, the body is just a shell. Your soul is the power beyond you. As long as we are alive we still have power. Our soul is powerful.
Now, in case the idea of having a soul isn’t encouraging, here’s another attempt. This time it’s a story.
Why Am I Here?
On a charming little street at a charming little house full of charming little gardens, a spritely gardener planted a new flower at the edge of the charming property by the worn sidewalk. It was a very nice flower that quickly took to her charming new home. Things were looking good for her and she soon met her first dog… at least she met the backend of a dog. It wasn’t the best introduction. The flower quickly learned she didn’t like dogs very much because the introduction included the dog lifting his hind leg, which is a very strange gesture to greet someone, and then worse, he started leaking this strange liquid all over her. At first the flower wondered if the dog was a high tech watering can… nope, and this wasn’t water. She didn’t know what it was, but she didn’t like it; it introduced her to what it means to need a shower after a shower. Fortunately, despite the unpleasantness, the little flower was able to brush it off – so to speak – and continue enjoying her new home. The next day the flower discovered a whole other type of butt. As a guy walked by, he flicked a cigarette butt towards her. The flower assumed the passerby wasn’t intending harm, but the cigarette butt bounced and bounced until it landed close enough that it singed some of her leaves. That too was unpleasant, but again the flower focused on something more positive. The next day was better… at least until that night when a man stumbling down the street holding a cup of what looked like dog leak ended up stumbling towards her and crushed some of her leaves with his clumsy feet. After that incident it was harder for the plant to focus on anything positive. She just saw that the rest of the charming property wasn’t being treated the way she was. With each day she became more and more discouraged. Why was she being treated like this? Why was life so much harder for her than for those around her? None of the other plants were being treated like this. Why was she? Why was she even here? Why wasn’t she planted in a safer spot? As she was having these thoughts, the gardener knelt down beside her and the flower remembered this was the person who planted her here, so she yelled at the little gardener: “I hate being in your garden!”
Because this isn’t a true story and I can take artistic license, the gardener understood what the flower was saying and calmly responded, “What seems to be the problem?”
The flower yelled, “Why did you plant me here? There are dogs and cigarette butts and people… I don’t know what I hate more!”
The gardener paused and then gently replied, “Life can be hard; there are lots of things that can hurt us, but I wanted you out here so everyone could see you and enjoy your beauty.”
But the flower protested, “Why me? Why did you make me be the one who is here?”
“Well,” said the gardener, “you were the one plant I knew would be strong enough to handle the problems that could happen out here. Others would’ve crumbled and died, but you have the strength to persevere. You also are also smart enough to recognise that there are dangers and to be careful.”
Starting to calm down the flower retorted, “Okay, but where have you been? Why have you just left me on my own?”
“I’ve been here the whole time. I’ll watch you from the window and while tending the other plants I’ll admire you. I make sure that you have enough good soil and water to survive and I was watching to make sure you could in fact handle being near the sidewalk. You’ve done really well.”
The flower was shocked. “I have? But it feels like I’m failing.”
The gardener encouragingly said, “You’re doing incredible. You don’t have to change the world; just make it a little more beautiful. I have a whole property of gardens and you’re one part of it. You don’t have to do everything; you just need to do your part, and maybe try enjoying yourself a little more.”
With a little hesitance in her voice the flower asked, “So what now?”
Smiling, the gardener said, “Well, in a short while I’m going to have to prepare you for winter.”
“What’s winter?” asked the flower.
“Winter is a time when you get to rest. Enjoy it while you can because soon you’ll be back out in full bloom sharing your beauty with the world.” The flower stood in silence for a moment and she thought about these things until the gardener asked, “Do you have any more questions?”
Sheepishly, the flower looked at the gardener and asked, “Does it get easier?”
In a very serious but calm voice the gardener replied, “There will always be something that challenges us, but you need to remember you have the strength to get through it.”
“But,” started the flower, “why do I have to do it alone?”
“I will always be here for you. When you need a little extra help, I’ll make sure you get it. If things get a little too crazy, I’ll find a way to get you through. And one day, when it’s time, I will bring you inside my house to be with me. You’ll really like it there. Life is so much better with me in the house, but for now I need you to share your beauty with the world around you.”
“So you do care about me?”
“More than you’ll ever know,” and with that the little gardener got up and said, “Here’s a little extra fertilizer for fun.”
Once again the flower was left by herself, but this time she didn’t feel alone. She knew someone cared about her and would protect her and help her grow. Life may be tough, but she would be tougher. Life may be unpleasant, but she was part of a beautiful garden and she would play her part.
The end.
Rev Chad David, www.ChadDavid.ca, Learning to love dumb people