Chad David:    Therapist, Officiant, & Really Cool Guy
(905) 536-0022 | chad@chaddavid.ca

Chad David

Learning to ? dumb people

Spanking is a gift

by

The other day I heard someone say: “Spanking is a sign that the parent’s brain is underdeveloped,” (written with more eloquence than the person could actually say).  My reaction? “I wish you were my kid, so I could hit you right now.”  Spanking is bad?  Uh, no.  Spanking is great. I love spanking… not like a pervert (said in creepy voice): “Hey baby, I want to slap your bottom, mmm.”  Yeah, I don’t get it in that form, but when it comes to being a form of discipline, spanking is a parent’s way of saying I love you… don’t grow up a moron.  This person claimed spanking was bad because it scars a child.  Scars a child? How are you spanking? If you’re like: “I’m Wolverine!” (slash) and blood shoots; yeah, that’ll scar; that’d be dumb.  But spanking is different.  Spanking is clapping, but instead of two hands it’s a hand and someone’s bum.  It’s not the exact same as clapping.  I can’t imagine being at a concert: I love this song (spanking bum), or being at church singing: “I love Jesus… hey slap my bum and sing along.”

I’ve heard people say spanking teaches kids to hit… no.  It teaches them if you do something you shouldn’t you will be hit.  Maybe kids would learn to hit if the parent randomly spanked their friends (guy) “Hi Bob,” (Bob) “Hi Jim,” (randomly spank each other).  If a child saw this then I can see why he or she would think it was okay, but otherwise spanking teaches that you should listen to people bigger than you because they can hurt you.

Being a parent is hard. Parents deserve this. I’m not saying: “I’ve had a bad day, hey Tommy come here I need to hit something,” (Pow… zowee… zoink and other old Batman terms used for fighting), but if your kid is disobeying you give two warnings and if a third time: whack, problem solved, lesson learned.

I’m sure someone is thinking: “Chad, spanking is cruel and I don’t like it.” Uh, yeah, I think you do you just don’t realize it. For instance, if you were to get pulled over by a cop wouldn’t you love to hear: “Well, you’ve just earned yourself a $100 ticket that will cause your insurance to go up; you can either pay up or… I can spank you and call it even.”  Who wouldn’t be like: “Pants on or off?”  I would so rather hear: “Assume the position,” than “Here’s your bill.” Spank me, don’t fine me.  Of course a cop spanking would be different than a parent. I’m pretty sure a cop wouldn’t be like “I’m doing this because I love you,” or “This hurts me more than you.”  It’d be more like “I love this job! I have zero stress!”

Spanking really isn’t as bad as people think it is.  If you want to scar or ruin children don’t discipline them because one day they’re going to be in a movie theatre talking on a cell phone.  Someone is going to say: “Please don’t talk on your phone.  This is a theatre, a place of listening,” but your child will respond with something sarcastic and stupid.  This patron isn’t going to clap him on the bum, he’s going to mangle his face, pow, and people will cheer.  Without discipline, your child will grow up a moron.

In Proverbs, the wisdom book of the Bible, the writer maintains: “For lack of discipline they will die, led astray by their own great folly.” (Pro 5:23TNIV, www.biblegateway.com)   This verse is a little extreme for our society where we’re not as quick to stab each other in anger or get eaten by wild animals if we’re not careful, but it’s certainly true: “For lack of discipline they will get beat up or beat someone else up because of a lack of self control.”  If we don’t discipline our children they are more likely to grow up as morons who will have a hard time making and keeping friends, keeping a job and doing well in life because they lack the respect for authority that is needed to do well.  Being a parent is a big responsibility.  It’s not about being a “friend” to your child.  You are responsible for who they become, which is why in Proverbs it also says: “Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.” (Pro 13:24b, NLT, www.biblegateway.com)  If you love your children you will put their well being before you being the cool parent or their friend.

My favourite verse in regards to discipline is: “Don’t fail to discipline your children. They won’t die if you spank them.” (Pro 23:13, www.biblegateway.com)  However you discipline your child, whether a gentle word, time outs, yelling, or spanking, do it in love, and do what fits your child the best.  My dad only spanked me a couple times and then he only had to look at me a certain way, (my mom would just say “Don’t make me get your father.”) and I am eternally grateful because it gave me the respect for my elders that I needed to do well in school and life.  My parents didn’t like disciplining me, but they loved me enough to do it for my benefit and I can’t thank them enough.

May you love your children enough to discipline them, and may they heed your teaching in order to grow up successful and happy… and may you never treat your partner like a child, but that’s a whole other issue

By Rev Chad David, www.emotionalsex.ca

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